29 Jul 463: How to Stay Calm and Authentically Influence Others – An interview with bestselling author Bob Burg
How do you stay calm when the conversation gets hard?
Whether you’re leading a team, raising kids, serving clients, or navigating conflict with someone you love, your ability to stay calm may be your greatest leadership advantage.
In this powerful return to DREAM THINK DO, bestselling author Bob Burg is back!
And this time he shares why genuine influence doesn’t begin with convincing others.
It begins with mastering yourself.
Drawing from The Go-Giver Influencer, Bob reveals practical strategies for responding instead of reacting, creating trust instead of pressure, and leading conversations in a way that inspires commitment instead of compliance.
If you’ve ever walked away from a conversation wishing you’d handled it differently, this episode will give you tools you can start using today.
Have you been thinking about being a Coach or a speaker… but you’ve been wondering whether you have the authority to make it happen?
The Authority Archetype Assessment is a free, research-based tool designed to help you identify your unique authority style and discover whether coaching, speaking, consulting, advising, or teaching might be part of your next season.
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What You’ll Learn
1. Why Genuine Influence Creates Pull Instead of Push
- Bob explains why influence isn’t about convincing people
- The difference between compliance and commitment
- Why trust is becoming more valuable than information
2. The Surprisingly Powerful Skill of Mastering Your Emotions
- Why emotional intelligence is the foundation of influence
- Bob’s “Seatbelt Principle” for handling difficult conversations
- A practical visualization exercise that helps you respond instead of react
3. How to Set the Frame for Better Conversations
- What “setting the frame” actually means
- How to redirect difficult conversations before they become arguments
- Practical examples for business, leadership, and everyday life
4. Getting Clear on What You Really Want
- Why most people stop at the first answer
- How asking better questions leads to better decisions
- The hidden layers behind meaningful goals
Favorite Quotes
“Compliance will never take you where commitment can go.”~ Dondi Scumaci
“Take your emotions along for the ride… just make sure you are driving the car.” ~ Dondi Scumaci
“People do things for their reasons… not our reasons.” ~ Dale Carnegie, from How to Win Friends and Influence People
“The highest thing you could do with your life is to make every moment better because it passed by you.” ~ Michael A. Singer, from Living Untethered
Resources & Links
Learn more about Bob: https://burg.com
Get The Go-Giver Influencer: https://amzn.to/4eHHF7v
Previous DREAM THINK DO conversations with Bob:
Episode 268 – Where to Focus Now! https://mitchmatthews.com/268/
Episode 78 – The 5 Laws of Stratospheric Success https://mitchmatthews.com/bob-burg-becoming-go-giver-leader-5-laws-stratospheric-success/
Episode 5 – Getting People On Board with Your Big Idea https://mitchmatthews.com/bob-burg/
Why This Episode Matters
Technology continues to evolve at an incredible pace.
AI is changing industries.
Information has never been easier to access.
But Bob argues that one thing is becoming even more valuable: our ability to genuinely connect with other people.
If you want to build trust, lead with greater confidence, and create influence that lasts, this conversation offers practical tools you can start using today.
Your Next Step
As you reflect on this conversation…
- Where do you need to move from pushing to pulling?
- What conversation could benefit from setting a better frame?
- Where might mastering your emotions change the outcome of an important relationship?
Then choose one upcoming conversation this week and intentionally practice one of Bob’s principles before you walk into the room.
And if someone came to mind while you were listening, send this episode their way. Great conversations have a way of creating ripple effects.
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